Reality Moms

Why Have We Given Up on Summer?

I was waiting for a prescription and decided to take a stroll through the pharmacy aisles to browse pool floats and plastic drink tumblers shaped like coconuts. I finally found a three-foot-wide area of shelf space dedicated to the clearance flotsam and jetsam of summer’s last breath. After walking through aisles of Halloween and Thanksgiving decorations, I finally picked up the ear drops for the swimmer’s ear I got at the beach…because it is summer.
Pregnant Chicken

Sleep Deprivation Isn’t a Contest but Someone Get Me a Prize

Me to my friend, “I’m so tired. I haven’t gotten more than three consecutive hours of sleep in 13 months.” Random person (who was totally eavesdropping), “Oh, I know how you feel! I haven’t slept for more than 30 seconds in 375 months.” And so begins the “who has it worse” game that isn’t a game. On good days it becomes a jovial back-and-forth of the outrageous ways our brains are drained like your phone when you let your big kid play Minecraft or Pokemon Go.
Parent Co.

8 Amazing Life Hacks for Lazy-Ass Parents

Most “mom hacks” will cost you 20 dollars and be too complicated to implement in the first place. Out of a list of 100 “genius tricks” you might find two that look useful, and Pro Tip, there’s a good chance your toddler is going to notice if you try to sneak veggies into his food. If I had time to sew a specialty folio for individual crayons I wouldn’t be in need of hacking things in the first place. Even the name “mom hacks”  brings up the fact that it’s all on the mom all the time. Why can’t dads hack some shit?

Dear Mom Who is Totally Screwing Up

Dear mom who is totally screwing up, Today my five year old daughter screamed the whole way home because I would not buy her a pottery wheel. Today I lost my patience. I will lose my patience again tomorrow. I sometimes clean up her messes, because I can’t deal with the potential meltdown, or the calm presence it would take to walk her through how to clean it on her own. I let her watch kids’ shows with obnoxious characters who whine a lot and lack depth.
The Huffington Post

The Dishes Can Wait, And Other Lies

The words are superimposed on an idyllic picture of a child in nature or a beach with footprints leading to the horizon. There's always a hazy filter. The bottom caption implores you to leave a counter full of dirty dishes, to eschew housework, to be present for your children, for they will grow up before your very eyes. We are reminded that no one has ever said they wish they had spent more time doing housework, and less time with the kids. We know this already.

after the birth ⋆

This has, without a doubt, been the craziest year of your life, at least from my perspective. That whole being born thing may have seemed crazier from yours. In one four month period you turned five, saw me hospitalized with severe preeclampsia, your baby brother born at 31 weeks and his subsequent hospital stay, and you started kindergarten. Any of that would have been a huge change. But our family went through all of that in rapid succession. I wonder what you will remember of it. You are so

Letter to my daughter - Amendment One ⋆

Today the people of North Carolina are voting on whether or not to amend our state constitution. And it seems like the people are going to vote for it to pass.  Usually when a constitution is amended it is to give more rights to people, but today it is being used as a weapon to further take rights away from people we love.  And that makes me sad.  There is a good chance you are going to see me cry today.  And probably tomorrow, too.  By the time you read this you won’t remember that, which is wh